Monday, October 12, 2015

My five small pebbles...

Then, staff in hand, David selected five smooth stones from the wadi and put them in the pocket of his shepherd’s bag. With his sling in hand, he approached the Philistine.
                                                                                                                   1 Samuel 17: 40
I'm feeling a bit down lately. Not clinically but enough to make me more conscious of finding the good in my days as they pass. That is a good thing. I suppose, if one must be depressed, it's good to pull oneself out as often as possible. Sitting in a dark hole never worked during the first half of my life. I'm grateful to have been led to this option for the second half.

Today we decided, between errands, to stop at The Vigil to pray for the babies. On the way down, #3 wanted to read us a story from his kids Bible and chose David and Goliath. I smiled because I identify with that story so much at this point in my life.

When we arrived, it was nearing lunchtime and I knew it would be a bit crowded but it doesn't matter much. We have been there during some interesting times and the kids know to pray for people that seem off-balance. We were warmly welcomed by the other vigil goers and we proceeded to the empty end of the circle to say our rosary.

All the kids were standing fairly quietly, holding their signs and praying (I say this because I followed along almost the entire time). People, as usual, were passing by with eyes averted. That's OK too since we were there for a short time and prayer for the babies and moms was most important.

A woman, a bit older than me, walked by and said loudly enough for me, "poor kids". It didn't register until she was gone. When she passed again on the other side of the street while I was mid-Hail Mary, she met my eyes when I looked up and smiled. She shook her head strongly and said many things that I was grateful were out of earshot. Please pray for her. I do worry about people who have that much anger in them. I have anger, please don't misunderstand, but it's usually not vented at random people on the street doing things that don't appear to concern me.

We left not long after to finish our final errand and head to the park for lunch. I told the kids why it was nice that David and Goliath was our story this morning. If you look for me on Pinterest, my username is 5smstones. These beautiful gifts above are my small stones (poetic license...I know it's supposed to be smooth). I'm not sure what God intends to use them for but I know that they are His and He will call them to their work. I'm just trying to keep them facing upward whenever possible.

On the way home I told them about the woman's comment and we talked. I told them she was very angry and we have to pray for her and all the people who hold so much anger in their heart. I told them that many people, including people they see in church or play with on the playground, think abortion is too sticky to be involved's no one's business. They know that abortion isn't that's a baby being murdered. I also told them that the doctors, when my blood work wasn't perfect, thought maybe it would be easier to not have the difficulty that might come with the birth of #5. They had many questions and had many, many good thoughts. I am pleased with their understanding and their beliefs at this point.

I don't pretend that they will always be this clear in their thinking. I know that I struggle with society and all the pulls that cause you to stumble along the way. So many days I feel like David looked heading toward Goliath. I pray that I can have his pure trust in God's plan. I pray that we can all work to follow God, even when we feel like the little boy against the giant.

I hope you are enjoying this beautiful day...what a gift from the Creator.

We are blessed.

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