Saturday, August 20, 2016

Life...and God's love

It's been one of those roller coaster ride weeks. I'm not a fan. That's my weakness...if only I could remember ahead of time about God's love that usually swoops in at the best possible moment. Then, perhaps, I could offer that suffering for someone who is hurting even more than me...working on it.

 - Monday was the Assumption of the Blessed Mother into Heaven. Not a holy day because it's Monday and, you know...we went any way. I can't even remember, other than being grateful for Mass on such a wonderful celebration.

- Tuesday I went to a Life in the Spirit gathering. The name...well, I suppose I got confused. I thought we were going to hang out and talk about how the Spirit was working in our lives. No, we sang and some people waved their hands around. Charismatic. Not my deal. Not a good way to spend time away from my family.

- Wednesday, to make up for my absence on Tuesday, we had the medal ceremony for a double-gold. They sang the Anthem and everything. It was great.

I think it was swimming although it looks more like tennis!

- Thursday was one of those glorious end-of-summer days at the pool. Friends new and old to hang out with and enjoy the last few days before school begins again.

Such good when we were growing up

- Friday - Some of the same friends plus a new one. Good friend from yesterday turns into "mean girl" now that new friend is here. Ug. Every difficult and maddening feeling I have about middle school comes flooding back. Not cool.

- Today - I woke up and just kind of knew it would be a sad day for me. It's the third anniversary of our sweet Bernadette's journey from Earth to Heaven. It seems worse this year for some reason. So, I was grateful that DH removed the other little people for the morning so that I could clean and reflect. It didn't help my mood. Neither did knowing that we would be going to the parish Mass and picnic this evening.

God usually allows me time to wallow in my self-made-misery for a while before rescuing his poor child. Today was no different. Before Mass I dropped a cup of water on the floor because I'm like that when my mind is elsewhere. Then, walking out with my food (and kids), I slid on some water on the floor and twisted my tendon-repaired ankle. When I, in deep and pure mortification, moaned to DH, "I hate this place (expletive removed)" I think God had enough.

Did He rain down the hellfire I deserved? No, of course not. He is our Loving Father. Like a good father (or better than a good father), He revealed a friend that shared her secret stash of adult beverages and eased the pain for a while...He provided the mean girl and her mean friend but also provided a sweet girl for my #1 to hang around with (soothing to my mom's heart)...finally, on the walk out, he placed both the woman who provided the landing zone for me in the previous fall (turns out she's a former homeschooler and was so gracious that I used her as a cushion) and a neighbor  with whom we walked home and caught up for our yearly visit.

God is good. He is good all the time. He is so much better than we deserve...better than we could hope to earn. On days like this I am grateful that His love isn't earned. I would be very much in trouble.

Tomorrow will be a new day. The Lord's Day. Perfect to begin again and show the gratitude I have for His support and help on such crummy days as this when I forget His abundant love for me. That kind of love is so good to know in this life. Constant, stable, enduring.

We are blessed. 

No comments:

Post a Comment